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16 June 2011 @ 06:53 pm
fic: your flag on the marble arch  
title: your flag on the marble arch
rating: r
pairing: damon/elena. mentions of stefan/elena. post season finale. road-trip-verse.
summary: And the fact that he can’t stop looking at her, even if it’s just the tense line of her back, just makes it twenty different shades of pathetic.[damon's pov]
a/n: this is for badboy_fangirlbased on her prompt, for being awesome and encouraging and just so much fun. And in return I hopefully get Boone/Shannon!! [See, major excitement]
disclaimer: I own nothing.

Prompt:

don't you wanna hold each other tight/don't you wanna fall asleep with me tonight

don't you wanna stay here a little while/we can make forever feel this way

It starts like it usually does.

Actually, he’s not sure how it usually starts but it usually seems to end with them on the opposite sides of the road, glaring at each other, threatening to leave. They never do though, and maybe if he was that guy who gave a damn he’d think it means something. But he’s not. She should remember, he’s not that guy.

She’s standing by the side of the car, staring at the miles of field, the small incongruous cabin in the middle of it, trying to get a bearing of where exactly they are. Or maybe just trying not to look at him. And succeeding. And the fact that he can’t stop looking at her, even if it’s just the tense line of her back, the strand of her hair that’s managed to escape its rubber confines, just makes it twenty different shades of pathetic.

“Where are we?” she asks, turning, crossing her hands over her chest, in that half-blank, brittle tone she’s taken to using whenever they talk, as if she can’t bear to use the same pitch, the same language as I forgive you, I like you now, just the way you are.

He looks around, pretends to, whatever, “I don’t know, Elena, you looked so confident there with the steering wheel, I was sure you knew everything there is to know about anything.”

She can’t help the soft sound of tiredness that escapes her, he knows this because if she could, she would, she hates to let him see her weak. “Seriously, we’re going to do this? Now?”

He shrugs, doesn’t trust himself to speak, to not say something stupid. He’s already said enough stupid things lately to cover for the entire eternity he’s going to be alive. (Elena, I-- you should’ve met me in-- you have to know-- I love --)

His arm hurts like a bitch, and there’s one moment where he just wants to take a chainsaw and hack it off. And of course she notices. This is Elena, she can’t stand his guts, but she always notices. And he can never figure out whether he hates her or loves her, more for it.

“Is your hand fine?”

He flexes his fingers and tries not to flinch, “All thanks to you, it’s well rested.”

“God,” she breathes, “you’re such a bastard. I was just trying to help, okay.”

‘Bastard’ is something he does well; he’s had over a century of practice in it.

“Yeah,” he says, sarcasm cutting through the stone of her expression, carving it in something akin to disappointment, like she’d been thinking he was better than this. Well big fucking surprise, he’s not, “you’ve helped.”

“I don’t even,” stops, tries to stop her voice from shaking; “I don’t even know why I try.”

He doesn’t know either.

“Fine,” she says again, ignoring his silence, “if you knew where we were supposed to be, why didn’t you just tell me.”

“Oh, was I allowed to do that?” he can’t seem to stop, but at least it’s better than falling at her feet, telling her he loves her again and again and again, “I was so sure it’d violate some ethical code pertaining to your choice to do whatever insanely stupid thing you’ve taken it in your head to do.”

And now it’s the night and they’re nowhere and he has a sickening feeling this is all he’s ever wanted.

“The only reason,” she’s gritting her teeth, he can live with that, he can’t live with her looking at him like she did that night, he can’t live with her pity, he can’t live with her holding him and being in love with his brother, but he can live with her anger, “the only reason I asked to drive was because you’re obviously not fully recovered and--”

“—your overactive Martyr Syndrome wouldn’t allow the suffering of a fellow human being—oh wait, that’s a bit of an overstatement, because guess what, Elena, I’m not human, and I can handle myself perfectly fine, thank you.”

He can barely stand, and he knows his stumbling’s giving lie to his words, he can see the concern in her eyes, even in the dark, even though she can only just see his face. She reaches her hand out, as if to touch him, then pulls it back again. This is how they let all their moments go, he knows that. A broken series of almosts.

“We’ll stay in the car,” he says, breaking the silence, he can’t stand silences with her, “till tomorrow. Move on.” He’ll be fine till then, he has to be.

“We can’t,” she sounds tired, so tired, “it’s going to rain. We don’t know this place; it won’t be safe to stay in the car. Especially with lightning or something.”

It’s odd he hadn’t noticed she’s right; the air’s filled with warning signals, the sight, smell, sounds.

He knows the car is probably the safest place there is, it’ll act as a Faraday shield in case of lightning, but he’s not familiar with the district and he’s not in the mood for a freak storm destroying their only means of getting back—getting somewhere.

“You have a better plan?” more to be a dick than anything else.

“We’ll have to go there,” she turns back to the cabin, and that’s the last thing he’s been expecting her to say, because she can’t be that clueless. It isn’t a good idea; it’s the worst fucking idea in the entire world actually.

“Sure,” he says, “if you’re going through the ‘top twenty’ list of romantic clichés, fair warning, it’s going to end with simultaneous orgasms and a declaration of everlasting love.”

The color rushes through her veins, spreading through her skin, and it’s only at moments like these he remembers how young she actually is. He doesn’t have time to remember it when she’s breaking through windows, trying to save everyone around her, trying to offer herself up as a sacrifice, trying to fight vampires with makeshift stakes, or any of those ridiculous things she does with monotonous regularity, as a force of habit. And it’s odd, because she’s old enough to make his saintly brother swear, whisper her name like a chant elenaelenaelena, she’s old enough for her soft sounds of pleasure to be the soundtrack of his own release, alone in his room, listening in, hating himself. But she’s still not old enough to not react, to hear it, say it. She’s still not old enough for that. He hopes to god she’ll never be old enough for that. Hopes they won’t take that away from her, like Katherine did from them.

“I--” she stops, starting to shiver, “there has to be love for it to be a ‘romantic cliché’, Damon.”

Touché. She’s not in love, she’s just alone, searching, lost.

He hauls his bag from the car; it’s heavy as hell, when the fuck did that happen? She walks alongside him, stumbling over the stones. He pockets his free hand, resists the urge to take hers, stop her from falling, because he knows he won’t be able to let go again. She’ll stay here with him a little while, but he can count the seconds off in his head when she’ll be much too far again.

The cabin is exactly like any other cabin the middle of nowhere, “not the dream vacation spot you were imagining, huh.”

“Not exactly,” she refuses to take the bait, and sometimes she’s older than him. Or maybe just not in love. There’s nothing grand about the feeling, it sucks and it’s pointless and overrated and it ruins perfectly good one-liners, “good thing we’re not spending forever here.”

He could if she’d stay, he wouldn’t mind forever feeling this way. Or maybe he could just stake himself and put the world out of its misery.

She sits gingerly on a broken down couch, the humid air making her clothes stick to her skin, her hair plastered to her head, one hand reaching up to untangle the mess, mouth turning down in frustration. She’s inviting, seductive, provocative, and still Elena. She used to remind him of Katherine sometimes, now Katherine reminds him of Elena. It’s the same, but it’s not, he doesn’t know what changed. Doesn’t want to know what changed.

“Take a picture,” she says suddenly, eyes still closed, “lasts longer.”

“How do you know I don’t already have some?”

She opens her eyes, looks straight at him, “do you?”

A shrug, well calculated, “no.”

“I have yours,” she says unexpectedly, “on my mirror at home.”

He remembers those photographs, different memories and different people and all those things that still matter even with Klaus and vampires and werewolves and death and war. Somewhere along the way, you decided I was worth saving. I wanted to thank you for that.

He pulls his arm closer to his body, the pain is distracting, and he needs distractions.

And then she’s taking off her shirt, and he’s pretty sure some part of his brain shuts down. Probably that part which lets him take the breaths he no longer needs.

“Mrs. Robinson, you’re trying to seduce me.”

“Shut up,” she says fiercely, pulling down her tank top, like it changes something, tearing her shirt into neat strips.

It’s only two minutes later, when she’s got his arm in an improvised sling, that he realizes why, and god, she needs to stop doing this.

She looks up at him, pleased with herself, her smile bright and open, and something inside him clenches with tenderness. He hates this feeling. He can handle wanting her. He can make crude remarks, let his gaze wander, imagination transform his hands on his cock into her mouth, but he can’t handle being in love with her. He’s not good at it.

He falls down on the couch, too tired to even pretend to not be. She watches him in concern and he’s supposed to be the big bad vampire here, saving her, but mostly she ends up saving him, and it sucks.

“How--” she clears her throat, “how long haven’t you fed in.”

Too long, “you don’t need to worry about that.”

She scrunches her face in irritation, “yes, I do, if I’m going to be sleeping with you—”

He laughs, unnecessarily, immaturely, but there are only some things he can hold on to now, and he’s damn well going to hold on to them.

“I don’t want to wake up drained of blood. That’d really put a damper on this dysfunctional rescue mission.” her voice falters, and in her way, she’s just as obvious as he is.

She moves to his bag, unzipping it, and he watches as she takes out bottles after bottles of alcohol, it’d be amusing if his arm didn’t hurt so much, if watching her didn’t make his head hurt.

She turns to him, after the last one’s out, “seriously?”

He grins, “you’re the one who forced your company on me on this trip, I’d packed just for myself.”

She walks towards him, determinedly, and leans down, till she’s close, too close, and why the fuck is she standing so close? She pulls down the strap of her tank top and shifts her hair to the side, raising her shoulder slightly.

He pushes her away, face hard, eyes lingering on the half-healed scar on her skin; they’ve been here before, “no.”

“Good going, Damon!” the sarcasm doesn’t cover the fear, “this is exactly the time to be driven by morality.”

“No,” again.

“You’re falling to pieces,” she says, grimly, “I don’t know why, what Klaus’s blood did to you. But don’t you fucking dare collapse on me, not here, not now, not ever. Stefan did it, when he needed to. And you need this right now.”

“You’re in love with Stefan,” he bites out.

“So?”

“So, it’s different,” she should know that, “it doesn’t hurt. It’ll hurt you right now--” if I do it, he doesn’t add, doesn’t need to.

“You don’t get to make choices for me, Damon,” she’s glaring now, and he wants her so badly, it makes every part of him ache, “You don’t get to choose to play the hero whenever you feel like it.”

“No,” he says again, as long as it takes for it to get through. He won’t.

“Fine,” she breathes, her face kaleidoscopically reflecting emotions, too fast to judge, “fine”, and breaks his bottle. Picking up a shard, cutting into her skin, and of course she would fucking do this.

“You idiot,” he’s so angry, he can barely speak, barely form words, concentrate on anything other than her blood, “you idiot.”

He tries to get up, walk up to her, and finds he can’t, he should’ve died. He deserved to, it would've been better than this. She walks up to him instead, kneels down, fulfils about a million of his fantasies, bringing her wrist to his mouth. And he’s weak, so weak, and he hates being this way, hates her seeing him like this.

“Please,” she says, her face breaking into tiny shards of pain, “don’t do this right now. Please, Damon.”

He tries to resist, for about a fraction of a second, gives up, gives in, reaches down, taking her hands in both his. Swallows her blood, Elena’s blood, his tongue flicking against her wrist, trying to stop the bleeding, trying to draw more blood, he doesn’t even know. She holds in the soft sounds of pain and bends her head, resting her forehead against his, breathing hard, breathing so fucking hard. He’s painfully aroused, wonders if she can tell, wonder if his senses weren’t dull, he’d be able to smell her arousal, stops wondering when her lips touch his forehead. Unconsciously slides his hand between her legs, her soft cry of his name, he’ll keep that in memory, just the way his name sounds when she says it like that.

Her hand becomes limp in his and he realizes he’s taken too much blood, and it’s so hard to stop, to pull away, to pretend he isn’t going to become addicted to this.

But he does, it’s Elena, and he does. His arm doesn't hurt as much, he realizes. He can’t look up at her.

“It’s okay,” she whispers, like she knows he needs it, like she somehow always knows, “it’s okay.” And she’s wrapping her hands around him, like she did once, like she always does, no matter what he does to her, no matter how many times he does it. She always stays.

He tries to pull back, apologize, make a crude remark, do what he always does to screw up, whatever.

"It didn't hurt," it's a confession of something more, or maybe not, maybe it's just for him, for his sanity, but he'll take it, keep it, hold on to it, "it felt...okay."

Someday he'd like to show her that, how good it can feel, be in her deeper than anyone has been before, his blood in her veins, someday.

“Stop.” She says, avoiding his eyes.

“Stop what?”

“Stop looking,” takes a deep breath, “at me like – that.”

“Like what,” he asks, prolonging the moment.

She looks into his eyes, “like that.”

He can’t, he should tell her, shifts his hand, loses the moment, “we’ll have to sleep in the car.”

She looks back at the rusty nails sticking out, unconsciously holds her hand with the other, thumb across the cut, “this was a stupid idea.”

“Those are your forte,” he tries, she laughs, makes his night.

In the car she holds onto him, falls asleep on his shoulder, the rain making trails across the window, drowning the whole world. He stays awake, though.

 
 
Arabian: Damon & Elena10arabian on June 16th, 2011 01:43 pm (UTC)
This was really good. Sorry, I can't offer much beyond that, just, this was really, really good. I really loved reading it. Really, really, really good.
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 16th, 2011 02:53 pm (UTC)
Haha, you don't have to offer beyond that, you made my day, I'm always so worried about prompt!fics, it makes me happy that it at least sort-of worked for you!
(no subject) - arabian on June 16th, 2011 03:11 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - youcallitwinter on June 16th, 2011 05:10 pm (UTC) (Expand)
jane_wanderlustjane_wanderlust on June 16th, 2011 01:49 pm (UTC)
flawless
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 16th, 2011 02:54 pm (UTC)
THAT GIF MADE ME LOL SO HARD. Thanks, bb <xx
unoshotunoshot on June 16th, 2011 03:49 pm (UTC)
Your being so prolific leaves me guilt-ridden, like I'm failing to hold up my end of a bargain we haven't made. But don't stop writing, anyway, or who will entertain me? ;)

Love your Damon voice, as usual. Love the actions belying the words. Love the acknowledgment that Elena is /seventeen/, which is not something we often see people actually talking about and is really kind of gross in that Buffy/Angel sort of way. What is it with centuries-old dudes and teenage girls, anyway?
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 16th, 2011 05:14 pm (UTC)
I'm betting 'prolific' is a nice way of saying, WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOUR FICS ARE BREEDING LIKE BUNNIES. And you're definitely not keeping that end of the bargain we haven't made *nods* (I am so greedy for your fic, it ain't funny D:)

I love Elena acting seventeen, it just makes her fun, that she does stupid things and doesn't know about Faraday's shield. But then Damon does stupider things so I'm not sure if age's got anything to do with it. And you've got me thinking- SRSLY, what is it with teenage girls and supernatural creatures (and watching them sleep!!)
(no subject) - unoshot on June 17th, 2011 04:04 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - youcallitwinter on June 17th, 2011 08:20 am (UTC) (Expand)
sassy, classy, and a bit smart-assybadboy_fangirl on June 16th, 2011 04:08 pm (UTC)
I'm so gutted right now, I have to go away and lick my wounds -(and start planning some kind of Boone/Shannon fic!) but I'll be back with a better response. For now, this is all I've got:
Photobucket
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 16th, 2011 05:17 pm (UTC)
Oh my god, I am actually pretty nervous. Like I told you, I hate disappointing, so if this didn't work for you, you must let me know. (And btw, if you don't want to write S/B that's totally fine! I would never write a pairing I don't even ship!) AWW, LOOK AT THE GIF :D
(no subject) - badboy_fangirl on June 16th, 2011 05:25 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - youcallitwinter on June 16th, 2011 06:46 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Brainzz_Insanee: Elena - Glowingbrainzz_insanee on June 16th, 2011 06:25 pm (UTC)
WOW, just wow. Beautiful and incredible and amazing. I love your work, love your language, love how you capture your characters. Great that you talk about Elena being 17 (that's something I want to try to do more), and how she's still only beginning life. I was flailing around when you had Damon drinking her blood <333 Gave me goosebumps thinking about it, esp mentioning the arousal etc. Made me think of Buffy & Angel when Angel was poisoned and need slayer's blood to be cured... good times :) So much to say, I feel like I'm not covering everything I want to tell you xD

FAVE LINES:
And the fact that he can’t stop looking at her, even if it’s just the tense line of her back, the strand of her hair that’s managed to escape its rubber confines, just makes it twenty different shades of pathetic.

she’s old enough for her soft sounds of pleasure to be the soundtrack of his own release, alone in his room, listening in, hating himself. (have always wondered if he listens in xD)

That whole drinking blood paragraph...and the last section with him "looking at her like that" not even needing to describe it because we all know how he would be looking at her<3

Once again, beautiful (added to my memories) :)
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 16th, 2011 06:50 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! Damon says so many things on the show as a character that I can't bring myself to ever actually write them, so I revert him back to S1 whenever I can. I think it'd be kind of awesome if Elena makes a move and Damon refuses, just for the angst it will be certain to generate :D And I'd love it if Elena offered Damon her blood for whatever reason; in the books the vampires didn't have sex, their blood-drinking was incredibly sexual though.

Haha, second Buffy/Angel mention in this post, it's so weird I still haven't seen it, considering it was such a massive part of popular culture!

I'M SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT :D
Shaitanah: damon/elenaistne_pieklo on June 16th, 2011 07:35 pm (UTC)
I loved this so much! <333 Once again, you portray them so perfectly, and the chemistry between them is just tangible. *_*
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 16th, 2011 08:21 pm (UTC)
Thank you! :D Damon/Elena is so much about chemistry and looks that I'm afraid to touch that in fic, but I'm so glad you still thought it came out!
OCnative: VD: Damon in the shower ab shotocnative on June 16th, 2011 09:56 pm (UTC)
WOW! I really liked this!! Your writing style is awesome and I loved the Damon internal dialog!

Of course I was hoping for an X rated chapter 2. Is that so wrong? LOL.
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 17th, 2011 08:22 am (UTC)
I agree, nothing is quite satisfactory without Delena smut, but I'm so bad at it!! If you want to go ahead with it, I very much encourage you :D
sassy, classy, and a bit smart-assy: TVD: DE OTPbadboy_fangirl on June 16th, 2011 10:35 pm (UTC)
Okay, here's your FOR REALZ comment!
Damon's obstinance--the constant pick, pick, picking--so him, so part defense mechanism, part years of ingrained habit...gah. Why do I love him and all his flaws SO MUCH?

And now it’s the night and they’re nowhere and he has a sickening feeling this is all he’s ever wanted.
Oh, bb, you and me both! Gah.

[LOST sidenote: the Faraday Shield thing sort of comes into the mythology, not literally, but figuratively, in S4.]

she’s old enough for her soft sounds of pleasure to be the soundtrack of his own release, alone in his room, listening in, hating himself.
This kind of thing KILLS me. I just want him to have his own stuff with her. Poor bb.

There’s nothing grand about the feeling, it sucks and it’s pointless and overrated and it ruins perfectly good one-liners
Oh, Damon. So perfect.

He could if she’d stay, he wouldn’t mind forever feeling this way. Or maybe he could just stake himself and put the world out of its misery.
First of all: prompt reference FTW! Secondly, I love that his perspective is that the world is miserable--not him alone.

something inside him clenches with tenderness. He hates this feeling. He can handle wanting her. He can make crude remarks, let his gaze wander, imagination transform his hands on his cock into her mouth, but he can’t handle being in love with her. He’s not good at it.
I have total head canon for when he's fantasizing about Elena that he goes the self-love route. He doesn't use other women in her place. When he's with other women, they distract him and he doesn't have to think about her.

As for the last part--I have this funny kink with these two that the act of blood sharing is MORE intimate than actual sex. It just works for me on that level, because it is more, and especially any time Elena willingly gives her blood to Damon, I'm just all *flaily* and *guhing* and basically dying of the SQUEE.

So yeah, I'd copy and paste the whole last section if I thought it would underline my love for it more.

So basically, I'm your slave for life now. And I promise to work on Boone/Shannon fic for you this weekend!

Edited at 2011-06-16 10:41 pm (UTC)
sassy, classy, and a bit smart-assy: TVD: Damon pursing lipsbadboy_fangirl on June 17th, 2011 06:38 am (UTC)
Re: Okay, here's your FOR REALZ comment!
And I forgot to mention this line:
He laughs, unnecessarily, immaturely, but there are only some things he can hold on to now, and he’s damn well going to hold on to them.
which is all kinds of perfection! GAH!
Re: Okay, here's your FOR REALZ comment! - youcallitwinter on June 17th, 2011 09:13 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: Okay, here's your FOR REALZ comment! - waltzmatildah on June 17th, 2011 09:25 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: Okay, here's your FOR REALZ comment! - youcallitwinter on June 17th, 2011 07:29 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Ceciliecila81 on June 16th, 2011 11:02 pm (UTC)
Wow! That was amazing! I love the way you write Damon and his thoughts, very realistic and "in character"! The angst is killing me though, but in a good way! Lol! Great work! :D
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 17th, 2011 08:23 am (UTC)
I'm glad you thought he was in-character, he has such bi-polar mood swings so I never know how exactly to write him, so mostly I write him saying one thing and thinking something else! Thank youu :D
waltzmatildah: tvd: damon and elena on the edgewaltzmatildah on June 17th, 2011 04:57 am (UTC)
ARGH!

I am not yet coherent. Expect caps lock flail...

Here goes...

OMG I LOVED IT! IT WAS SO ANGSTILY HOT AT THE END THERE, WHICH, LET'S BE HONEST, IS THE BEST KIND OF HOT.

The dynamic between these two that you've created is so freaking PERFECT. Gah. That is all really. Just gah!
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 17th, 2011 08:49 am (UTC)
YOU ALWAYS HAVE SUCH PRETTILY COLORED ICONS. I just keep writing road!trip fic where no one has any idea what exactly they're road-tripping for D: BUT I'M GLAD YOU THOUGHT IT WAS HOT, I ALWAYS FEEL SO AWKWARD WRITING THEM. However, in S3, they need to go off together, trufax. Thanks so much! :D
(no subject) - waltzmatildah on June 17th, 2011 09:19 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - youcallitwinter on June 17th, 2011 07:33 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - waltzmatildah on June 18th, 2011 08:29 am (UTC) (Expand)
ever_neutral: tvd ~ i'm stupid/i'm stayingever_neutral on June 17th, 2011 06:47 am (UTC)
This is. GAH. Gorgeous. And messy, and so very them. Bless this fic.

“Sure,” he says, “if you’re going through the ‘top twenty’ list of romantic clichés, fair warning, it’s going to end with simultaneous orgasms and a declaration of everlasting love.”

FLAWLESS.
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 17th, 2011 09:04 am (UTC)
Your icon is my favorite D/E scene ever! And I think 'messy' is an excellent word, they are always so conflicted and unsure and obviously attracted that resolution is almost impossible. Thanks so much :D
(Deleted comment)
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 17th, 2011 07:35 pm (UTC)
Oh, I love Damon antagonizing Elena, I think that's pretty much the ONLY way he can deal with being in love with her. And that's what makes them different from Stefan/Elena, who mostly agree on so much. I think if you leave Damon and Elena together in a confined space they'd either kill each other or blow the place up with sexual tension. And Elena too, can't deal at all, so she has to be extra harsh, prove a point to herself. Thanks so much :D
(Deleted comment)
(no subject) - youcallitwinter on June 18th, 2011 08:12 am (UTC) (Expand)
(Deleted comment)
(Deleted comment)
(no subject) - youcallitwinter on June 24th, 2011 05:10 pm (UTC) (Expand)
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youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 18th, 2011 08:13 am (UTC)
Aww, thank you :D I honestly wish that Damon/Elena have lots of sarcastic, bitter scenes in season three because they’re going to have to resist each other while Stefan isn’t there as a visual presence of why they shouldn’t, so I’m guessing it’s going to be all the harder to resist and all the more dangerous to give in (S3 IF YOU END UP DISAPPOINTING ME AFTER EVERYTHING, I SHALL…THINK OF SOMETHING SUITABLY EVIL AND VILLAINIC). I do think Katherine took Damon’s innocence away from him, the difference between him in 1864 and present-day version is so palpable, and I think he would hate to do that to Elena. ILY <3
verdant_fire: vd: never mind death Professorverdant_fire on June 18th, 2011 03:35 am (UTC)
it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah
And now it’s the night and they’re nowhere and he has a sickening feeling this is all he’s ever wanted.

This is how they let all their moments go, he knows that. A broken series of almosts.

*flails* You have such a way of writing these sentences that are just gutting in the best way. I hope you write lots and lots more of them. <333

OH and I forgot to say that the fact that you used a line from "Hallelujah" for the title only made me flail more. I love that song, and it's very Damon.

Edited at 2011-06-18 03:45 am (UTC)
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 18th, 2011 08:13 am (UTC)
Re: it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah
Thank you! I’m so glad this worked for you :D And I seem to be writing way too much for them (LIKE, WHAT EVEN IS WRONG WITH ME), and it’s like I’ll be out of ideas soon enough. And then I’ll probably make some purple icons , haha. This is my second fic with a line from Hallelujah as the title, in fact that was a D/E too. God, I’m so unoriginal D: But yes, that song is completely and utterly Damon, it’s so beautiful!
нσω ∂σ уσυ нσℓ∂ α мσση вєαм ιη уσυʀ нαη∂?: diaries ♔ de; personal spacefiddlings on June 18th, 2011 04:47 am (UTC)
GUH. Excuse me while I die of your awesomeness. I think I might become a little bit addicted to your fic; it's amazing. ♥
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 18th, 2011 08:14 am (UTC)
LOOK AT DAMON TOTALLY UNSUBTLY INVADING ELENA’S PERSONAL SPACE IN YOUR ICON. Sorry, bit of a moment there, haha. Aww, thank you, my fics seem to have no variation in plot (…or any plot), so I’m glad you can still read it! :D
(no subject) - fiddlings on June 18th, 2011 03:30 pm (UTC) (Expand)
damon_s_86damon_s_86 on June 18th, 2011 09:54 am (UTC)
I don't know what to say. Normally I'd have something to say right about now, but I'm just... in awe of you right now.

How you envisioned them together, all those moments they let slip, how you versed it, it felt so right.

"This is how they let all their moments go, he knows that. A broken series of almosts."

Your characters felt real, I was able to envision those scenes, it felt like bloodlines 111 all over again, but post 222.

Like we're revisiting the beginning of their love story and seeing how much different they are now, from where they began.
The difference is striking.

I loved it. and I'm going to add it to my memories because I will need to revisit it.
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 18th, 2011 01:50 pm (UTC)
Oh, that's such a very lovely comment :)

It felt like bloodlines 111 all over again, but post 222.

You have no idea how happy that made me, and I think you've pretty much summed up what I want from season three- I need their season one dynamic back. I need them to argue, and disagree and behave like brats but still have that underlying trust that they used to ("I'm trusting you"). Like the way Elena was with him in the first season, even when she knew him as a cold-blooded killer, they built something out of it, Bloodlines was their tentative attempt at something like friendship. I don't need to see any more grand confessions of love, just those subtle scenes that S1 was composed of.

Thanks a lot! <3
(no subject) - damon_s_86 on June 18th, 2011 02:52 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - youcallitwinter on June 24th, 2011 04:56 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - damon_s_86 on June 24th, 2011 07:02 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Sandrine: Damon/Elenasandrine on June 18th, 2011 12:28 pm (UTC)
I really really love this - the tension, the way Elena practically force-feeds Damon because she can't help worrying about him no matter how much he pisses her off, how completely and perfectly in character they both are. ♥ So much love!
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 18th, 2011 01:53 pm (UTC)
And I love you for saying that :D The fun thing is how many genres Damon/Elena fit, you can write anything from a comedy to a tragedy and they have feelings for each other that'd fit both. And for some reason I want to see Damon not-fully-recovered and Elena being a reluctant nurse (preferably in her Halloween costume :P)
(no subject) - sandrine on June 19th, 2011 10:29 am (UTC) (Expand)
comeundone_82: Boone/Shannoncomeundone_82 on June 19th, 2011 10:45 am (UTC)
God, I loved this! I´m so picky with fanfic and haven´t read much lately but your stuff is always SO GOOD! I can hear their voices, it´s so in character, I can picture every scene you write. It´s hard to find (at least for me). So thanks a lot for writing them and sharing your stuff. Amazing read!!!

(And I wouldn´t mind Boone/ Shannon as well :D)
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 23rd, 2011 06:24 pm (UTC)
I've gotten really picky with fanfic as well, which sucks because I can barely find anything to read! But thank you so much, I'm glad this stuff works for you :) Characterization is the only thing I go for plot what plot, and I just never know whether I got them right!

OH, I WANT TO WRITE SO MUCH BOONE/SHANNON. I'M SO IN LOVE WITH THEM. I approve of the icon :D
(no subject) - comeundone_82 on June 25th, 2011 10:12 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - youcallitwinter on June 25th, 2011 05:44 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - comeundone_82 on July 2nd, 2011 09:51 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - youcallitwinter on July 3rd, 2011 06:34 pm (UTC) (Expand)
sassy, classy, and a bit smart-assy: fall in lovebadboy_fangirl on June 21st, 2011 12:55 am (UTC)
loveyourlife_xloveyourlife_x on June 21st, 2011 06:14 am (UTC)
This is amazing! ♥ Damon is perfect haha
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 23rd, 2011 06:25 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much, Damon's denial and non-denial is fun to write :D
vie_dangerouse: title courtesy of w.faulknervie_dangerouse on June 24th, 2011 01:31 am (UTC)
I really like the continuation of this mini 'verse. This story felt like an episode of the show in my head--it was that perfect. All of the juxtaposition you used here worked so well, as in my favorite bits:

She’s inviting, seductive, provocative, and still Elena. She used to remind him of Katherine sometimes, now Katherine reminds him of Elena. It’s the same, but it’s not, he doesn’t know what changed. Doesn’t want to know what changed.

&

Someday he'd like to show her that, how good it can feel, be in her deeper than anyone has been before, his blood in her veins, someday.

They're so broken and breaking and it's beautiful. Well done. WELL DONE. ♥
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on June 24th, 2011 04:54 pm (UTC)
This mini-verse is so ridiculous because no one seems to remember Stefan and I'm all, NO, LOL, YOU GUYS, DON'T SEXUALLY TENSE THIS PLACE UP BEFORE HAVING A HEARTFELT DISCUSSION ON STEFAN, but alas, they're much too impatient, what can I say?

Thank you so much, I'm so glad you liked it! :D
Jenna: TVD - damon elena carbrokenbell on July 14th, 2011 03:52 pm (UTC)
WARNING: I am having such a hard time writing this review, because your story still has me fan-girling all over myself.

The way you write each character is just so right and perfect for each of them. This fic is just… I couldn't have imagined this awesomeness no matter how hard I tried! Everything about it: Damon's steadfast fixation on Elena; the flawless dialogue; Damon's never-ending mental self-flagellation; Damon noting (fearing?) the parallel between Katherine's influence on him, and his influence on Elena; the snark back and forth; Damon's mind drifting in and out of the gutter; and let's not forget the THE SEXUAL TENSION.

And the prose, oh the prose. If I tried to tell you which lines were my favorite, I would have to copy and paste your entire story into this comment box. But here are random sampling of sentences that blew me away:

". . . sarcasm cutting through the stone of her expression, carving it in something akin to disappointment . . ."

"This is how they let all their moments go, he knows that. A broken series of almost."

"The color rushes through her veins, spreading through her skin . . ."

". . . face hard, eyes lingering on the half-healed scar on her skin; they’ve been here before . . ."


HUGE thank you for writing this gem. And, Someday he'd like to show her that, how good it can feel, be in her deeper than anyone has been before, his blood in her veins, someday. Can this day perhaps be soon? In fic verse? From you? *looks around hopefully*
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on July 14th, 2011 06:43 pm (UTC)
That is so sweet of you to say! I genuinely find this fic very funny because it's like a collection of every bad fanfic trope ever with random, abandoned cabins in the middle of nowhere and rain and everything, and no mention of why they're out and what for, all a bit *headdesk* really, but I'm unfortunately lazy and setting up background takes time, and all I want to do is get to the Damon/Elena snark and blood-drinking, heh.

But I'm glad you thought it was okay for the characters because seriously, it doesn't have a plot, so if it had no characterrization, it would probably not be a fic at all, and Damon is sort of fun to write-- like I like him angsting-but-being-a-bastard, I don't like him declaring his feelings at any given moment, seems a bit OOC to me (although that might just be me, since the show's perfectly happy to let him do it, so maybe I'm the one actually writing him OOC. Very Inception that!)

Haha, I wish, I would love to do sexy!times with them, I'm just so BAD at it D: Maybe someday, haha. Thanks so much!
serenity_kemeia on November 29th, 2011 09:28 am (UTC)
Great story. Couldn't stop reading.
youcallitwinter: youcallitwinter on November 29th, 2011 07:21 pm (UTC)
Thank youuu :)